Skip to main content

Awkward is the new Outcast


I don't really remember being socially awkward.  In fact, I have always taken pride in being a witty conversationalist since I love to poke fun at other people and myself.

But growing up, strangers would always think that I am mataray or suplada.  Maybe because I tend to be very quiet and abrupt with people I do not know.  And I've always hated that they let this impression get in the way of us getting to know each other.  I cannot count the times when people have told me "akala ko mataray ka, di naman pala".

So I can only imagine how socially inept people dread social situations where they are thought of as rude and snobbish even when they are not.



And that is called "dyssemia".

According to the internet, Dyssemia is a difficulty with receptive and/or expressive non verbal communication. It basically means inability to interpret and use non-verbal skills.

It comes from the Greek dys (difficulty) and semia (signal). The term was coined by psychologists who wrote the book "Helping The Child Who Doesn't Fit In", about the hidden dimensions of social rejection. 

For adults, it may be the cause of one's awkwardness or the feelings of being an outcast. Much like dyslexics who do not readily process written language, sufferers of dyssemia cannot readily understand nonverbal messages which would make them seem dense and insensitive.  Which is just so sad.

So the next time you are in a gathering and you see someone rooted to the curtain at the corner of the room, go them, smile and chat them up.  They may just be a tad shy or they have isolated themselves because they have dyssemia.  Either way, do your share and help.

On a funny note, do you that there is a test awkwardness?  Go click on this link and find out: 
Awkward Timer

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The English Patient

There are movie lines...

And then, there are "the movie lines"


The English Patient is one of my all time favorite movie.  It stars the oh-so-mysterious Ralph Fiennes as Count Almasy (who incidentally is also a real person).

It is based on a novel of the same title by Michael Ondaatje (which is also one of my fave writers).

Michael's writing can be described as "imaginative and whimsical."  He likes to write stories about the ravages of war and the interesting people living it.

He also writes about relationships and betrayal.
 "Betrayals in war are childlike compared with our betrayals during peace. New lovers are nervous and tender, but smash everything. For the heart is an organ of fire." And of course, love.

This movie has "the movie lines" to die for.


Almasy to Katherine:  "Swoon, I'll catch you"
If only this statement can be trusted. If only guys are all like this in real life.

Singapore

Singapore is so much like Makati -- tall buildings, fast people & talkative Filipino yuppies. Not so much sights but then again, we were there to overspend on pasalubongs and go retail shopping. I don't want to brag, but between here and Manila, Manila wins hands down (on my own standards). :-)



Our hotel was located at Orchard Rd. and it has (thankfully) Starbucks at the groundfloor. We went down one night only to realize that coffee (as with cigarrettes) is so much more pricey there.

Athough, I must say, the air is worth breathing and the streets are super clean. Thank God for countries who respect the rights of non smokers to nice, clean air.

Lingerie, baby steps and women's liberation

If you ever heard the saying "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind" then you can relate to this post.

In Saudi, a 2006 law banning men from working in female apparel and cosmetic stores has never been implemented due to various conservative groups who are opposed to the idea of women working in common areas visited by men and women, like malls.


Finally, the government has decided to enforce this law effective this month after long standing protests by Saudi women.


Strict Saudi law prohibits mingling of unrelated men and women.

Which kind of makes it awkward for women to be accompanied by male relatives in buying their intimate wear from men behind the counter.

"I and many other women like me were always embarrassed to walk into lingerie shops because men were selling the goods," said Saudi shopper Samar Mohammed.

She said that in the past she often bought the wrong underwear "because I was sensitive about explaining what I wanted to a man."
Saudi w…